Have to Publicly Speak? You Freak! One-on-One (or One-to-Five)? You Thrive! What Do You Do?

(Happy almost Thanksgiving, all! I'm going to lighten things up since some of you may be prepping for presentations after the holiday. This week and next, I'm going to tackle some student questions. Be prepared for next Tuesday when I answer a question on profs behaving badly. In the meantime, I hope your holiday is incredible! PS: In follow up to my last post, I'd be glad to update with a photo once the construction next door is finished. For now, the building continues!).
 
I love, love, love student questions! Keep them coming!!!!

Here's one I just received and, boy, if I only had a quarter for every student who feels this exact same way! 

Dear Ellen,

I'm a university student from another country, an extrovert, and an eloquent, humorous person when with my friends, or networking with unfamiliar people (groups under 5 people are no problem). My problem with speaking arises only in a public context, for example when participating in a classroom discussion, or when forced to give presentations. I get so nervous that I'm physically unable to speak coherently. My heart beats really fast and I can't catch my breath to articulate my words. I sweat and tremble, and my mind also goes blank so I don't have the words to begin with. The bottom line is, people I interact with outside of class often assume that I'm a confident and fluent communicator, only to be surprised when I have to speak in class.

I know I have the verbal skills and wit to perform, but it's just the psychological/emotional aspect of speaking to an audience that really gets to me. How do I overcome this obstacle? I've already been practicing a lot, but it seems to be of no use once people's eyes are turned on me. I have a presentation coming up to a very large class. Help!!!!!!!!

*****


Wow, I have had many students who are extremely articulate and comfortable in interpersonal settings, but put them in front of a group? Their entire persona changes and nerves set in.

Let's start by celebrating what's awesome:  This student (and so many other interpersonally comfortable students...) are eloquent, humorous and innately extroverted. This says that the skills, dynamism, and personality are there... we just need to comfortably transition these qualities to a larger crowd (and, preferably, while standing!)!

Here are my suggestions for the student, and questions that you can ask yourself: 

-I completely empathize with that feeling of being physically unable to speak and having those physiological signs take over. So, to start, what anxiety-reducing strategies are you trying? We need to get your body working with you, rather than flying away from you in panic. The best method I know of is called "cognitive reciting." So, when you start to feel symptomatic before the speech, go off to a quiet space (outside of the room, etc.) and begin to say (even whisper) everything you see in front of you out loud i.e., "There's the door. It's painted peach and has a silver handle. The room number is on the outside, number 14..."

The actual act of talking takes a lot of effort from our minds and bodies. Therefore, if you can try this technique, the physical symptoms may very well abate. I did a guest post on this subject for a public speaking coach's blog called Speak Schmeak.

-When you approach your speaking area, what do you typically do? Do you put your notes down and just begin? Where are your eyes? On your notes? Or on the audience? Believe it or not, setting down your notes, taking a step back, dropping your shoulders, and looking at your audience for a second or two (and smiling, of course) can decrease nervousness. Nervousness is typically far worse when a speaker looks at notes and then suddenly decides to look up:  Whoa! A flood of eyes, which would freak anyone out!

-Speaking of notes, tell me about them... Are you using note cards? Full text notes? The notes you use can be the single biggest stressor for you as a speaker, and can definitely create more apprehension and physical symptoms. Think about it:  If you're looking down and grappling for what to say next, or if your font is too small, your heart will start racing, you may have trouble breathing, and you'll find it difficult to actually squeak words out.

I always recommend that speakers use key word, large font notes and only practice from those notes. This way, you are more conversational with the audience, less scripted, and you don't feel the stress of having to remember every single word. The key word notes free you up to ad-lib and embrace natural conversational (extemporaneous) flow. I have a Camtasia presentation on how to use this technique in this post.

-You mentioned that your mind goes blank immediately. I will reference the key word notes here, once again. It's totally fine to look down and get your first word to trigger you... the audience won't have a problem with this as long as your eye contact returns to them... quickly! If you would feel more comfortable saying something like, "Welcome, everyone!" or "I hope everyone is well today!" or even "I'm so glad to be here" to break the ice a little bit, that's also just fine. It may feel more comfortable than launching right into your speech content.

Let's also talk about a quick reality check because mind blanking is one of the largest fears a speaker has:  Remember, the audience has absolutely no idea what you were going to say. So, whatever you say, in the audience's mind, will sound like it was supposed to be there.

-How much are you moving around during your speech? It sounds like you have a lot of physical anxiety happening and more movement i.e., deliberate steps--maybe two or three--and hand gestures can help your body work out some of that nervous energy. It will also give you a feeling of talking "with" your audience, rather than "at" your audience.

-I hear you saying that you are very comfortable in interpersonal situations, even with as many as five people. How can we turn the perception of public speaking (or even class discussion) into one big conversation for you? Is there a way to reframe the energy you're giving it? Because, really, depending on your delivery style (conversational is ideal...), you are having one huge conversation with your audience. Sure, they may not be talking back, but they are giving you those nonverbal signals... smiling, nodding, upper torso leaning forward to indicate interest, etc.

-I think your upcoming persuasive speech angle sounds fascinating and like a lot of fun (I omitted this in the question for anonymity). Be a little selfish about your speech content: Add some of the wit that you mentioned; phrases that you will enjoy sharing and feel excited about. Getting a positive reaction from your audience can help your confidence in the moment! 

Really, it sounds like there isn't as far to go as you might think. If you had severe communication anxiety in all settings, then I would say we need to determine other strategies. However, there are many strong communication attributes in place to draw upon for speaking.

Believe it or not, if you could find a way to feel even 1% better about your upcoming presentation and own that excellence, it will create further confidence for you and you may find that you actually enjoy presenting to more people. 

I'm going to think good thoughts for your next presentation!

Students, how are your presentations going this term? I'd love to hear about this... or any other class-related challenges! Other public speaking aficionados out there? What advice do you have for students who are interpersonally comfortable, but publicly hesitant?

Dear Diary, Today I Practiced My Speech (Again!): How One Veteran Presenter Preps

(I have a love of public speaking that borders on the ridiculous. For years, I was a competitive public speaker with Toastmasters International in my leisure time--I guess it was my "sport"--before I ever started teaching. Even though I stand before a classroom all the time as an educator, I deeply respect the art and craft of public speaking, and I strive to keep my muscles strong! That means speaking whenever possible. Students frequently ask me about my practicing strategies, how much, how often, what it looks like. I think students perceive that since speaking comes so easily to me, I must just get up and go. I documented my prep process from an engagement I had several days ago. I hope it will be helpful for every student to see how much time even a seasoned speaker puts into speech prep. Enjoy!) 

August 1, 2011:
It's my birthday. 

My cell phone rings and Beth, my new speaking agent, tells me that my dream of sharing my "Chatty Professor" message is about to come true:

"I have some good news! The Council of Unions and Student Programs (CUSP) wants you as their keynote speaker!"

After digesting her words, I go into audience analysis mode: Who is my audience? Beth said I'd be speaking in front of student leaders from all over the state. A half-hour later, I'd conduct a second presentation for student activity directors/leadership advisers from the various community and technical colleges.

I have a little over a month to prepare the presentations. The big day? September 7. 

August 5 - 7:
I speak with the CUSP organizer for more audience analysis. How many people? Are the students diverse in age? What can I extract from my core communication message to benefit each group? After the conversation, I e-mail my topic plan:

-For the student leaders: 1) How communication excellence in college helps students brand themselves; and 2) Specific interpersonal communication strategies (I called them "words-on" strategies... not "hands-on"... what do you think?) to manage interactions in leadership and group situations.

and 

-For the advisers/directors:  Communication strategies around coaching, delivering feedback, and starting difficult discussions; how directors can model communication for students so they can "say it forward" (I'm on fire with the phrases!).

The organizer tells me I've got it, so I can now begin writing. 

August 8:
I've used the same method of speechcrafting for years: I always write out my full speech as an essay. In this case, I have two speeches to write. With the student version, I face a hiccup: 

Speeches have “color” when we use stories and examples from the audience’s real life. But I’m not a student. I haven’t been a student for a long time now. I need an actual student to help me out--and one who is a leader. I leave placeholders in my text to fill in later.

August 10-12:
I review my word-for-word content, reading it out loud over and over... scrutinizing the sound and combination of the words, the rhythm of the sentences. If I have a slew of long sentences, I won't be able to capture breath easily. I make changes accordingly. 

I am still missing my student examples, but I finalize the text by the 12th. Then, I turn my full manuscript into large-font, key word notes. Here is a Camtasia tutorial I created for Oxford University Press's Understanding Human Communication text that explains the process.

August 10-14:
Vacation ('s all I ever wanted... Vacation... had to get away! I digress...)!

No work on my speech, but I feel good about my head start. I'll start the actual practicing right when I get home.

August 15, 2011
My daughter is in camp and my son is in preschool, so I have ideal practice conditions: I am alone!

I never, ever practice in front of other people. I also don't practice in front of the mirror. (If these tactics work for you, by all means, work them!).

I print out my large-font, key word notes and begin.

Choppy and fumbled best describes my delivery at this stage.

The message never sounds the same from the perfectly constructed version, so this initial practice session is always a difficult transition. However, I'm striving for thought-to-thought, conversational tone--not rehearsed-sounding word-for-word delivery. I want my audience to feel like I'm engaging with them... not talking at them.

I'm not timing myself on this pass. That will come soon. Right now, I have two presentations that I'm verbally clunking my way through.

August 16 - 19:
Kids are still gone during the day, so my practice continues. Now I’m timing myself. Content sounds more fluid, but I'm unable to get a seamless pass-through. 

I struggle to gauge the timeframe due to the massive audience interaction in both presentations. I try to predict how long people take to talk. I nod and say a bunch of “uh huh’s” in response to an invisible audience. 

August 21:
Family is home. I tell my husband I have to go to the store. I sit in the parking lot and talk out the intros of both presentations. I've forgotten one set of notes at home. I consider tattooing them to my forearms.

August 23: 
I tap my Twitter pal, Matthew T. Forrest (@matthewtforrest), a superstar student, social media intern for YouTern (http://www.youtern.com), and PTK president at a Massachusetts community college for some student examples. We schedule our conversation for the next few days.

August 24-26:
Continue practicing both presentations at least once per day, but now I have another deadline: My daughter will be out of camp for 10 days soon and I have a bunch of "life" to do before she's there. Her first day of school is the day of my presentation, so I will not have another "alone" day until the actual gig.

I'll be spending a lot of time in parking lots.

August 29:
I interview Matthew, who gives me great material. I am incredibly grateful. I easily incorporate his examples, cite him, and soon commit those additions to memory.

August 30 - 31:
My daughter is home now, so my only practice opps are when she has a playdate. Of course, I want to play with her, too. When she is with a friend or watching some TV, I take advantage of practice time in my bedroom behind a closed door.

Then I have to deal with one of our cats, Catbert, loudly meowing, breaking my concentration and rhythm. I send him out.

Just when I start the intro again, the damned cat cries outside the door (equally distracting!). I let him back in, trying to ignore him rubbing his face against the hard edge of the folder that holds my notes.

September 1-3:
No practice... last weekend trip before my daughter goes back to school. I attempt to practice in my head in the car. No go. My 3-year-old screams "Michael Jack-in CD”. Then he toddler-sings his way through “Beat It.”
 
September 4:
I'm getting very familiar with the grocery store parking lot; our house is well-stocked! Since my practice time now occurs in bits, I run through different sections of each presentation whenever I'm alone. I seem to have the introductions down, so I will not practice those again until closer to the presentation. 

September 5-6:
Very little practice in the back-to-school ramp-up. I keep my key word notes by my bed so I can look at them each morning and night.

September 7:
The big day! My car ride is just under three hours. I drop my daughter off for her first day of school, then go home and fully practice both presentations in my kitchen. On the way to the site, I speak them out further in the car—and I listen to a little Michael Jack-in.

September 7, 3:30 p.m.
I'm in a room of 400+ (!!!!!) fired-up student leaders from all over the state. With messaging that they need to “show their spirit” during the conference, they chant, they whoop, they dance. If my usual nervousness feels like moths in my stomach, seeing the size of this audience feels like large butterflies-to-baby-bats (not full-sized bats, mind you—I do have experience at this). I remind myself that I’ve spoken in large auditoriums during my Toastmaster days and I’ll be fine. 

Suddenly, I feel my mind go blank. What’s my first line again?

This is typical for me. I expect it. However, history tells me that I’m going to get up and use my nerves to energize myself and my audience. More importantly, the audience has no idea what my notes contain, so as long as I squeak out something that remotely sounds like it’s supposed to be there, I’ll be okay.

In my speaking experience, I trust.

In my practice investment, I also trust.

I tell myself, “You know this. Go nail it.”

September 7, 3:40 p.m.
I am introduced. My opener flows smoothly and is well-received by the audience. They rise when I ask them to, and respond to my questions. They participate in the role-plays. They are welcoming, energetic, magnetic. 

I’m on fire, too. I now have the “good burn” in my belly that inspires me to project with boom, to pause in strategic places for effect, to work my vocal inflection in a way that sends the deepest, most impactful verbal and nonverbal message.

I am in my element. I am me. This feeling is what I love, love, love about speaking down into my bones.

Then I check on the time. Damn times three. I only have five minutes and my two end-points will likely get left behind. The interaction moments took longer than I thought with this size of an audience.
Fortunately, the points were not included in my key themes that the audience read in their overview. They were extra extras.

I jump into my ending. I seal it up. The students give me a spirited applause.

Off to the next presentation.

Students, I realize that you don’t always have a month-plus to put into every single presentation that you have to give in college (or anywhere, for that matter). But think about it: I know many, many students give themselves too little time for preparation and then wonder why they fumble, have to read their speeches verbatim, and feel so freaked out about it--even ill!

Giving yourself the most lead-time before your presentations actually helps your nervousness. I have delivered tons of speeches. I can’t wing. Don’t put that pressure on yourself either.

If you have a presentation coming up, give yourself a good two weeks, if possible. Even one week, if you work on it every day. Finalize your notes at least 48-72 hours before the presentation and only practice with the notes you are going to use in the presentation.

I know speaking can be stressful. Follow even some of my path with your own prep and it will show. 

You—and your voice—will shine. 

Have questions about an upcoming presentation? It’s what I’m here for! Write in!!! Colleagues, willing to share how you prep for presentations?

For Some Things, It's Best to Wait... But Not for THIS Class! (Fall 2011 College Students... Talking to YOU!)

Are you a Fall 2011 college student? Will it be your first term in college? 

BRAVO! This post is for you. 

Is it your second, third, or squillionth term in college? Awesome! You're returning!

This post is also for you.

If you are not in college right now, but know any person who is, this post is for you to SHARE! 

You get it. On to the advice now.

I was thinking today about things that we should wait for and things that we shouldn't:

-Playing your 23rd round of Call of Duty when you told your girlfriend you'd be over at 3 p.m. (and that was three hours ago).

Wait. (Your trigger finger/thumb/pinky will thank you.)

-Taking said girlfriend to rom-com with Natalie Portman, Jake Gyllenhall, Anne Hathaway, or Ashton Kutcher because she's been dying to see a rom-com (and you secretly like saying 'rom-com', but you won't admit that to your friends).

Don't wait.

-Eating a Giant Kit Kat when you're already having a food baby from the super-stuffed crust pizza you just inhaled. 

Wait.

-Going for a run to burn off offending pizza and Kit Kat.


Don't wait. (Unless you've just eaten. Then wait 20 minutes. Hmm, that's swimming, isn't it?).

-Putting a $150 pair of jeggings on your credit card that your cousin's girlfriend's brother's hairdresser told you Kate Middleton wore on her honeymoon.

Wait.

-Getting knock-off jeggings at H & M for $30.

Don't wait. (Unless your credit card is maxed or you aren't supposed to be using your credit card!)

Ready for the last one:

-Taking Bionaturonicology 102 when you haven't even taken Bionaturonicology 101 or even 091.

Wait.

-Taking a required communication class your first quarter of college.

Don't wait!

As much fun as I had writing those previous don't wait's/wait's (honestly, I could have gone on for another hour... how lame is that?), this last one is serious:

Spring term after spring term, many students filter into either my Public Speaking (CMST 220) class or my Introduction to Communication (CMST 101) class with a slight eye-pop and a little bead of sweat that threatens to emerge from their forehead any second.

Why the stress?

Because graduation is looming and they've saved their communication requirement until The. Bitter. End.

On the first day of spring term, I always ask, "Okay, so how many of you saved this class until your last quarter?"

At least 1/3rd of the class typically raises their hand--sometimes more. I'll get to the reasons students wait in just a second...

What's interesting to me is that most incoming college students take English/Writing their very first term. Smart move, right? Strengthening college-level writing skills early before taking a boat-load of other courses that also require college-level writing? Brilliant!

Last time I checked, a boat-load of college courses also require one or all of the following:

1.  A presentation, either alone or in a group
2.  Talking or working with someone else in class (interpersonal communication!)
3.  A group project

Those assignments or projects can be worth a fair amount of the grade in those classes. 

You probably know where I'm going with this...

Doesn't it make sense to take Public Speaking/Introduction to Communication Studies/Basic Communication (or whatever this course is called at your college) EARLY?

Let me be specific here:  I'm talking about taking this class your FIRST quarter in college.

"But wait..." You may be thinking, "I am in my 5th semester at college. Done reading this post... going to check out my recent news on Facebook now."

Don't stop reading! (or believin'--according to Journey, or the Glee kids singing Journey).

Even if you are in Q5 of your college career, and you didn't take that comm class first, I still say take it NOW. Earlier, rather than at the end of your college career, can benefit you in so many ways.


All right:  Let's plow into reasons why students wait to take their communication class:

Reason #1:  They think they know about communication because they do it every day.

Just because we do something routinely doesn't mean we're doing that "thing" the best we can, does it?

If you had one argument this week or last where you or your communication partner walked away angry, frustrated, confused, etc., then maybe learning a little more about communication could help.

If you feel like you wouldn't know where to start if you were suddenly asked to deliver a speech, then you definitely could benefit from a communication course that involves some training in public speaking, or a dedicated public speaking course. 

Like I said before, so many of your other non-comm (rhymes with 'rom-com'!) classes are going to require communication assignments that you will likely be graded on, such as group work, speeches, or participation with others. So, even if you know how to talk, getting official training in how to improve your speaking either one-on-one, to groups, or in public can only stand to help you boost your skills for those other classes.

I won't even remind you that if you've read this post on employability, you know that learning how to better communicate can increase your "competition capital" when job hunting season begins. 

(Okay, I guess I did remind you).

Now let's look at the second reason students wait to take a communication course:

Reason #2:   They'd rather have surgery without anesthesia (or even a leather strap to bite) than deliver a speech.

Public speaking is the #1 fear of adult Americans since 1977 (according to The Book of Lists, which is a book... of lists...). Many colleges and degree programs require all students to have a dedicated Public Speaking course, which is different than a communication theory course that may not require any speeches, or possibly just one or two.

While I realize that public speaking anxiety is far more emotional than logical (and I will blog about some killer strategies to help you manage this fear in the future), let's take make a logical list of why fear of public speaking is not the best reason for saving the public speaking or comm course until the end of your college career: 

1.  Every single person in the class is going to have to give a speech. Does this mean that you'll feel no fear about giving that speech? Hell, no. You might shake in your Sketchers, but other nervous buddies will support you.

2.  Your prof in the public speaking course will likely have a whole lesson on helping you deal with your speech anxiety--it's a natural topic in any communication course. Conversely, your Bionaturonicology 101 professor may require you to deliver a presentation, but that prof will be focused helping you with your bionaturons. Or your icologies. That prof's first priority probably won't be to help you with your fear of public speaking. He/she expects that you worked on that in your comm class! 

3.  The last term before you graduate has enough stress surrounding it. Why save something you absolutely dread until the end? Why not get it over with? Doesn't waiting for anything that you fear just make the fear compound on top of itself? And do you really want to be uber-super-stressed by a dreaded class right before graduation? Let's say you do take your comm class early and it goes horribly (that's unlikely, but let's just say, "What if?")? At least you still have more time to retake the class. If you wait until the end of college, the hard fact is that this one dreaded course could also keep you from graduating. Ugh. Let's not even entertain that thought.

So, what's the communication lesson here?

Get your communication course done your first or next term in college. Here's what you do:

1.  Go look at the core requirements for your Associate's or Bachelor's degree. See what the communication requirement is. Public Speaking 101? Introduction to Communication 101?

If you are in a degree program that has a set schedule, ask your adviser if you can fulfill your Comm requirement early.

If you are in a degree program or college that doesn't have a communication req, don't think that this advice doesn't apply to you! A communication course can likely meet a Humanities or elective requirement and will still give you all the important benefits I've noted.

Once you've found your basic comm class, public speaking class, etc., sign up for that course in Fall 2011!

2.  Pack yourself with some information power! Learn about your upcoming comm course and even your new comm professor!

Visit your intended college's website, do a search for 'Communication' or 'Speech' faculty. You may have to look under the broader term of 'Humanities'. Find your prof, then e-mail or make an appointment to see that person.

Say, "I'm an incoming student who will be taking your Public Speaking 101 course. I'd like to learn about the course early. Can you send me a syllabus? One from the current term is fine." (Know that the prof might change some things around, but the basic course requirements will likely remain the same).

You can also ask/say:
-"What book will I need for this course?" Reading about communication ahead of time certainly can't hurt. The books on communication are--believe it or not--a bit interesting, even as a summer read, and you will be SO prepared!

You can even say:
-"I'm a little nervous about public speaking (or taking this course). I almost saved this course until the end, but it was recommended that I should take it early. Do you have any advice for me?"

Again, any communication prof is going to be keen on the subject of communication apprehension, fear of public speaking, or speech anxiety. (See? We even have three names for it!).

You won't be the first person to express this sentiment, and you will likely get a ton of practical and emotional assistance from both the prof and your classmates. After all, with so many adults fearing public speaking, you are going to have company.

3.  I will blog later on about first-day of college communication tips, but we have summer to enjoy first. So, I'll skip ahead to what you can do once you're in your comm course:  If you love, love, love, love it, sign up for yet another comm course! (Of course, I was going to say that!).

If you took Public Speaking first, try a Communication Theory, Interpersonal, Small Group, Mass Media, etc. course and use it as Humanities or elective credit. Again, look back on my communication and employability post. Too many stuffed pizzas and Kit Kats can hurt. Too much solid training in communication can't!

Be proactive:  Grab those communication skills that can benefit your classes, your entire college experience, your relationships, and your future career NOW.

Wait for other things.

Don't wait for this.